


Coming Out

by Tarlan



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, Community: mcsheplets, Episode Tag, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-01-15
Updated: 2008-01-15
Packaged: 2017-10-21 04:08:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/220738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nearly losing Rodney forces John to admit to his feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coming Out

**Author's Note:**

> A couple of prompt challenges in one ficlet! LJ mcsheplets #10. Resignation and LJ mcsheplets challenge table: Coming Out  
>  **Tag to Spoils of War**

The day had to come, eventually, when all attempts at pretense failed him. For years he'd stood by, resigned to say nothing, to do nothing, simply watch from the sidelines as everything he truly wanted stood just within arm's reach, and yet might as well have been a million light years away.

Today was different. The queen forced him to his knees, her thoughts invading his mind, stripping out all the things he had fought so hard to hide for so many years, singling out the one person who would break him -- Rodney. Even as he struggled against the Wraith guards holding him, he knew he could do nothing to stop her. He saw her hand pull back, her sharp teeth baring in eager anticipation of the feast standing before her. He could hear Rodney's fear-choked voice, an octave too high in panic, and he vowed in that moment to see her die even if he had to find a way to poison her with his own life force. He would see her sent to hell for harming the one person who meant everything to him.

When she faltered he froze in the guards' arms, confused by this twist in a terrible game as she ordered them all back to the cell unharmed. Had she read his thoughts, seen the darkness within them that threatened to consume her for all eternity? Every instinct screamed at him to pull Rodney into his arms just to assure himself that the man was unharmed but he had to hold his distance or risk breaking apart.

When the queen came to them with Teyla's thoughts spilling from her hated lips, John didn't hesitate to send several bullets straight through the queen's already weakened body, justifying his actions as saving Teyla when, in truth, it was revenge for what the queen had planned to do to Rodney. He let years of military instinct hold him firm as they destroyed the cloning factory and head home through the Stargate.

Standing on the balcony later with Teyla, John knew he had reached the end, that he could no longer pretend not to care deeply for the people around him, and for one person in particular.

"I...Teyla. I'm in love with Rodney," he blurted out, wincing at his own words and glancing at Teyla from one corner of his eye to assess her reaction. He was not prepared for the wide grin, or for the hand that patted the fist that was tightened around the railing.

"Yes, and you should tell him before he makes the mistake of offering himself to Doctor Brown as a future husband."

"What?" John looked up in dismay. Had Rodney's romance with Katie gone so far? He hadn't noticed them spending any more time together. He'd never seen them in any truly intimate setting, or even holding hands let alone kissing or... He shied away from any other thought.

"Rodney is looking for someone to love him, that is all. Tell him, John. Tell him he is already loved...by you."

John felt a moment of doubt before the nightmare image of the queen pulling back her hand before Rodney slammed back into him, and he knew he had to do this or walk away forever. He found Rodney alone in the lab, humming softly over some equations written upon a white board, and took a moment to simply stop and take his fill of the man who had wormed his way into his heart. He knew this moment would change everything. If Rodney rejected him then he might lose the best friendship of his life as well as break his heart, but if he said nothing then Rodney would go to Katie anyway, probably already had the damn ring, and his heart would be just as broken.

"Rodney."

"Hmm? Oh! Sheppard. I've been looking back over these equations from when I was..." he waved his fingers over his head, "...SuperRodney, and I think I've--"

"Rodney," John interrupted, taking Rodney's arm and drawing him away from the white board. Rodney paled, blue eyes widening in fear.

"Oh god! What's happened?" His eyes widened further. "Is it Teyla? The baby?"

"What? No! The baby's fine. Everything's fine, it's just..." Rodney's tense frame relaxed in temporary relief. John opened his mouth and closed it a few times. "Rodney, I..."

"Well, spit it out. Haven't got all day here."

"Hey!" John frowned as the words stuck in his throat. "Oh to hell with it," he murmured. He'd always been more of an action rather than words type of guy anyway. He grabbed Rodney's face in both hands, ignoring the yelp of fear, and kissed him soundly. Rodney froze and John drew back warily.

"That. You. What?" This was the moment that mattered, the moment when Rodney's brain rebooted and revealed which way he was going to jump. "You. You kissed me."

"That's what people do with people they love."

"I kissed Katie once. Well, it was Cadman actually controlling the kiss but I was there and... and... You love me?"

John licked his lips nervously.

"Is this one of those _as a friend loves another friend_ moments?" Rodney quoted the words with his fingers.

"Not exactly."

"Oh my god, you _are_ gay! The hair, the sexy slouch, the flirting with anything remotely humanoid, gender be damned."

"That would make me bi."

"Yes, yes, semantics." Rodney stated impatiently, and then that look of awe crossed his face again. "You're coming out to me?"

Before John could formulate a response he had Rodney's powerful body wrapped around him, and that devastatingly wicked mouth kissing the life out of him. Rodney pulled back suddenly, staring deep into John's eyes, his own revealing a joy usually reserved for the finding of ZPMs. "About time!"

This time when they kissed, neither of them felt resigned to hold back.

THE END


End file.
